Happy Mothers Day beautiful Moms!
What a wonderful and challenging roll that we have been given. There was one completely moving blog post that I read this week that I wanted to be sure to mention just in case your one of the few people that might not read this blog. Check it out. Its a MUST read.
I admit that I spent a great deal of time on Saturday wondering if I was really cut out for this life. Was I really prepared to parent this many children? Ok, I take that back. Was I really cut out to parent this many challenging children? Well, not really the little ones. Was I really cut out to parent this many teenagers? All at one time? Really God?
The events of the week have really thrown me for a loop. I mean basically my children have two full time at home parents and have had them for most every week for the past six months. We shouldn't be missing a beat here even though we are significantly outnumbered. After the event- the crisis that happened- and then another teen telling yet another lie to me... I was over it. I was ready to run away. I wouldn't actually run away but I did really want to just zone out and forget the troubles. I was absolutely in denial about the serious significance of what happened. Other than tearing up a few times here and there when things would remind me of the event, I wasn't able to really breathe and process the whole thing. I had done something wrong as a mother. Because if I hadn't then this bad thing wouldn't have happened to one of my kids right under my nose.
On Friday just in the midst of the tail end of the crisis (that might not be over for quite sometime officially), my husband got a phone call about a company looking to possibly hire him for the summer for some out of town work. Yea!
Yea Work! Yea decent Income! Yea back to normal! Nay I don't want to be home alone without him! Nay, I don't want to be here all summer without him! Nay, I don't want to deal with the crisis without him here! Nay, I don't want to do this anymore! Yea, I feel sorry for myself!
It's not official. But I might be single parenting it for most of the summer. I am sure that this really tipped the stress scales. My husband is excited about getting back to work. I am excited about him working. But when in the moment I feel so overwhelmed it was just the worst time possible to hear this news. We will know something official before the end of the month.
Just pray. Just pray that whatever is meant to happen will.
We do know that there is a company with a MASSIVE job starting soon right here in our town that he is trying to get on with. We are hoping for a phone call before he takes the out of town job. (Oh pray!)
But should he be leaving us...
I am really tempted to pile the kids in the van and take off for the summer back to family in Ohio. But then again, we are working really hard in therapy at the moment with Sophie. Things are going really well. I can't just give that up and pull her out for an extended time away. Not to mention we have a solid week in hospital planned for Jude and Angelina mid summer. And my Lauren gets married in August! She needs me here to help with planning and prepping.
My pity party is almost over, I promise.
I had a great mothers day. I met with some other Mom friends and families at the beach for a cookout and lots of running around for the kids. The dads and kids handled most of the cooking and cleaning up and it was a blessing.